A Halloween Party

Frankenstein, my friend, was in his prime
he was feeling content and so very sublime
It was dark, and all of his guests were so small
at last, finally, he felt, maybe he'd found his call

He sidled up next to a gloomy-gus Dracula
gave him a nudge and a gentle pat on the scapula
"You know, Vlad, I really like it 'round here
so smile a little, it's fun, be of good cheer!"

The count said he needed something to eat
but on bloodless Skittles and Nerds he was not so sweet
So Frank wandered around, said hi to the witch
chatted with Mr Wolf hanging out in the kitch

little goblins and princesses down below his knees
were besprinkled and busily buzzing like bees
passing candy to each other and looking in bags
giggling and laughing with zigging and zags

Mr Stein, as they called him, tightened bolts on his neck
and smiled down toward them and did a head check
Yes it looked like they were all accounted for
then he heard another delightful ring at the door

"I'll get it!" he cried and he strode cross the room
careful not to step on the little witch's brooms
he opened the door to a hale "trick or treat!"
and ten more tiny goblins appeared at his feet

"Come on in!" he said, "I need your help, pretty please--
there's a man over there I'd like to you to give him a squeeze!"
They shouted hooray and for Dracula they headed
Drac looked shocked, but happy, that his friend had said it

The party continued until quarter to eight
when the host monsters decided it was getting so late
they gave away the last Hershey and shooed guests outside
and they all went back to their castles and died.

The End

Moral to the story: you got to live a little before you die? Make the most of your life?  Go out and do all you can? Be nice to kids? Get home before the sun comes up?

STOP!

What will be the answer
if we don't stop the world
from picking up a hammer
or using a fist that is curled

when a domestic tranquility
rests on uncertain terms
of an uncontrollable rage
that starts from a germ

a disease that will thrive
in a house overruled
by violence and pain 
dolled out by a fool

Before you say to yourself
'there's nothing I can do'
it's time to take a stand
so be a man and be true

call somebody out
on their hurt and their hate
before they go too far;
to wait is too late

Love is a Stranger (in a car alone)

Last night I took another drive in my car
trying to get into the right frame of mind to talk to you
why can't I talk to you?

Yes, the stars were out; yes, there was a crescent moon
Yes, it was an easy drive to the top of the hill
it's always quiet at the top of the hill

It's nights like these that take me back in time
looking down on the lights that made me passionately blind
grabbing all the luck and the love I could find

let's take the back road down....

Love is a stranger in a car alone
feels so empty but I'm just five miles from home
and I want to talk to you

Somehow when these summer nights call
I see things that aren't real, or I see nothing at all

The stars they twinkle so relentlessly
I count on the morning sun to be equal,
reassuring me

but the moon is yet to go down and the warm wind swells
and the night just waits
because it knows me so well

3

3 was the number that came to
Me in my slumber as I 
Dreamed of the lovely days of spring

1 was of December days
2 was that January phase
3 were the crazy ways of May!

3 was the number that came to 
Me in my slumber as I
Dreamed of an endless summer with you and me

1 was a drop of water
2 our cup running over
3 a river running to the sea

3 was the number that came to 
Me in my slumber as I
Dreamed of a tree with falling leaves

If I shake that tree 
and the leaves don't fall
I just turn my back
then I get them all

3 was the number that came to
Me in my slumber as I 
Dreamed of the winter that was to be...

Showers

Showers in April
fall on my lawn
Showers in May
we always count on

Showers in June
in the first part, expected
Showers in July
anytime objected

Showers in August
dowse the State Fair
Showers in September
I think we had a pair

(A pair-- hmm
if you had two pears you'd have
a pair of pears.
If you had two of something that you really loved you'd have 
a pear of a pair.
if you cut up your fruits with a knife you'd have 
a pared pair of pears or 
a pair of pared pears)

Showers in October
are in the forecast
Showers in November
come and go so fast

Showers in December
Christmas is snowy
Showers in January
remind me of Joey

(Joey was a guy I knew who couldn't laugh without sneezing
everytime I told him a joke he'd sneeze and say
'that wasn't funny' but I knew he thought it was
because he always sneezed when he laughed
But, could he sneeze without laughing, you ask? 
Good question. 
Anyway, we lived together for awhile and once I said
'I'm going to go take a shower for an hour with a flower'
Joey sneezed. I'm pretty sure it was January.)

Showers in February
bite you on the nose
Showers in March
are ones I oppose 

(Suppose I oppose the throes of this prose?
I chose how it goes; I enclose my compose
I predispose to interpose, juxtapose, and foreclose
those on their toes expose what I knows.)

Showers are real
Showers are fun
I'm all out of gas
I believe that I'm done.

(done...hmmm....oh, never mind.)

Orville

Orville...

Orville...

Could you name your son

Orville?

How about Treetop?
Treetop Jones
Treetop Quinten Jones, botanist

or Tubkin
   Tubkin Walker
     Tubkin Waters Walker, peanut farmer

      or Starmaster
         Starmaster Powers
           Starmaster Flux Powers, production mgr.

            or Provo Utah
               Provo Utah Sampson, bicycle repair

if it's a girl: Sasha sha sha sha
 like an echo
     hi, my name is Sasha sha sha sha Gilbert
sha sha sha is my middle name (blink, blink)

or maybe Scythe 

   Scythe Fenderson

"Scythe Fenderson, CPA, could you hold, please?"


I always liked Kelvin, but Kevin is my brother, so...

How about U-Bolt? U-bolt M. Johnson

or Tranny, short for Transmission
    Tranny Smith
Mister Transmission Smith, esq.

all good names

but Orville

could you name your son 

Orville?

I can't even go there...

picture this...

close your eyes and picture this, if you can...

**you're standing in a river and it starts to rain, and you can see each rain drop hit the surface.

**you're at bat, the ball comes toward you at 80 mph, you swing as hard as you can and make solid contact, and the ball flies off your bat and lands a mile away.

**you bring the bow to your shoulder, string the arrow, fire, and the arrow sticks in the absolute center of the target.

**sleep overtakes you and you realize what is happening.

**you take an active part in your dream. 

**you catch the ball and zing! throw the sliding runner out at second base with a pinpoint throw.

**you see something dangerous coming across the field, and you yell to the people you're with "RUN!!" and you all do.

**you say something and everybody around you laughs, some uncontrollably. 

**you end your day sitting down, looking across a valley with an expansive, beautiful view and you feel fully satisfied and fulfilled and you can't wait to do it all again tomorrow. 

...and everything

Late last Thursday there was a terrible fight, someone named Armando lost his sight

"Pizza's my middle name," said the wrangler, "and Topping's my last name."

My interior decorator's name is Ranch Dressing.

Twist Tie Art tied two twisted twines tightly to two twin twisted sisters.

Ham and     eggs        
The space between ham and and and and and eggs is different. (Thanks Chuck!)

I got some steps to take, but I need to take a break

The shades of summer fade in the heat
the leaves of fall are falling at my feet

It took me three minutes to decide that three minutes was too long to wait for my toast.

Yes, I would like to swing on a star and carry moonbeams home in a jar; thanks for asking!

Dear little miss kitty: GET OFF MY FEET!

I sat at the piano in my driveway with two keys: one for my Subaru, one for my Toyota. I could not decide which one to play in.

Don't end sentences with a preposition, and everything.
Sentences don't end with a preposition.
Sentences with a preposition don't end.
Prepositions don't end with a sentence.
With sentences, prepositions don't end.
Sentences can end with a question mark!
Sentences can end with an exclamation point?
Huh, I didn't know that, and everything.

I gotta brush my teeth, I gotta close my eyes

They're their there

When I go somewhere
and it feels just perfect
I call it my 'there'
a place I can connect

Other people have their 'there'
a place that feels so right
when they feel with the universe square
in tune and spiritually light

Some people have many places
that they call their 'there'
usually with familiar faces
they feel so good: they're 'there'

so the places that your parents go
don't worry don't be scared
all those places are safe, you know
to your parents they're their "there"

Freeman Takes a Turn

It was my turn, so I pulled up my pants 
notched up my belt
took a deep breath and then exhaled
put one hand on my chin and the other on the side of my head
and twerked my neck

I reached down and touched my toes with my hands
stretched for a bit
pulled up my socks and kicked my feet
I put my hands on my hips and did a little faux-Irish jig
wiggled my hips

I took several big knees high, slow steps
touched my elbows
rotated at the waist and neck
looked over each shoulder at the opposite side of the play field
peered at Freeman

"Now it's your turn to try to turn a phrase,"
I laughed out loud
stuck out my fingers and counted,
"10 syllables in line one, 4 in the second, 8 in the third,
16 and 4!"

Freeman took his turn but he blew it already!

The News

after six
meta-mix
kitty pics
sound bite stix

anchor 'moo'
social stew
who are you
lucy liu?

Ryan stridin'
Obama glidin'
Seahawks hidin'
goodbye Joe Biden

nuclear dump
fashion lump
Donald's rump
poorman's trump

driving tips
bubbles on lips
sinking ships
channel 8 flips

France jews
popes in pews
now I choose
how I lose

this is how I pay my dues:
make myself watch the evening news

Sweet Thing

Once, early in my evening career
I went down the stairs to the fridge in the garage and got my self a beer
I drank it down and with a burp to keep
promptly wandered over to my pillowed couch and quickly fell asleep
my wife called out
maybe more of a shout
telling me with no doubt the shit I was in was deep

the hour was early and so was her rage
she could really get ornery for a woman of good looks and of such a delightful age
since the nap I was in was severe
there wasn't any possible way that I was going to start to hear
so she threw a pot
and of pans, a lot
I had no idea that a cookbook of kitchenware was piling up against me so near

Apparently I snorted
and then to a wet washrag and a snapping wrist she resorted
the neighbors tell of her warlike scream
but it wasn't enough to awaken me from my soaked in a 16 oz light beer dream
still on my leg
a welt like an egg
and a red spot that looks like the spot on Jupiter's side with a little extra gleam

I guess I turned over
exposing my posterior that sometime ago my brother nicknamed Rover
my wife approached, teeth bared
and bit me so deep in my bottom area that a lion hearing the story would be scared
still as I slept
even Jesus wept
as he forgave that woman and said that was a pain not even he had shared

when I finally awoke
from a dream of something sharp and hot that was giving me a poke
my wife was standing over me
a fireplace iron ready to strike me in my all of a sudden very tense knee
I said, "what?!!"
she said, "sot!"
"It was only one beer!" I cried, and then I realized I was not in any way pain-free

"Ouch!" I pouted
"Louse! pervert! drunkard! little man without a prayer!" she shouted
"I do so have a prayer
and right now I'm praying over that ugly spot on my leg right there
now what did you need?
I'm starting to bleed!"
"oh," she said, suddenly coy, "I'm going out and wondered if you could help me decide what to wear!"

Usually she's sweet
she's cute and wonderful and smells good and is adoringly petite
she can cook up a bear
and her hugs are unbelievably snug and heartwarmingly warm, I swear
but she gets upset
if she cannot get
the right color of skirt and blouse, to match her purse and her hair

sweet thing

Wee Little Man Goes For a Walk

The wee little man put on his coat
He told his wife he was going for a walk
She tried to give him a grocery tote
to bring home items, the pantry to stock

But he said, "no, I'll not do that.
My walk is my own. But I'll come back
with some treasures for you in my hat
but I won't take with me your grocery sack."

"But I need some flour and sugar and oil!"
cried his poor wife with her hand on her hip
"and I need some eggs and onions to boil!"
he didn't listen, just walked out side and gave her the slip

'Argh,' he thought, as he skipped over stone
'must I always be at the mercy of my wife?
she's always demanding and what's mine is her own
at least out here peace is my life.'

Just then his eye caught a beautiful yellow
a flower that hung off a bush near his race
and from it dripped honey, subtle and mellow
he picked it and into his hat it was placed

as he walked he passed an old almond tree
with nuts large and ripe, a hundred or more
he placed in his hat I'd say ten or twenty
and wondered what else he might look for

in the next small tree he saw a bird's nest
a Robin's, I suppose, with little blue eggs
he found an egg on the ground, which was best
for he couldn't reach the branch with wee little legs!

he came round a bend, and found a purple flower
considered it closely, and decided it was Allium
into his hat it went: quite a store for the hour
what riches he had--better than gallium!

he decided that his walk had certainly cheered him
so he turned back to the way that he came
to his house. when he left it had certainly feared him
that his wife was so crabby and always the same

he walked in the door and held out his hat
and showed her the bountiful and promised treasure
she hugged him tight and friends that was that
the rest of the day was bountiful pleasure

You Came to Me

You came to me
and you set me free
I was not cold but I'm so much warmer now
because you set me free

last night in your arms
I heard the river running free
I saw the lightning in the sky
I felt the wind just give up
give up and sigh

You came to me
and you set me free
I was not poor but I'm so much warmer now
because you set me free

thirty years or more
and I'm tired of playing the part
a little boy lost behind a closed door
just wants to give up
give up his heart

You came to me
and you set me free
I was not cold but I'm so much warmer
I was not poor but I'm so much richer
I was not weak, but I'm so much stronger now
Because you set me free

Thank you, Jesus!

Touch

I don't know why I touched the sky
it wasn't on purpose, it wasn't nearby
I didn't mean to do it, it just happened to me
as quick as a fox, as fast as a flea

I'm a little nonplussed with all I've touched
Though I've touched many things like slugs and such
I've touched the red rubies of a monk on a mountain
I've touched the jujubes of a freak in a south land

I once touched the fingers of a black praying nun
I touched the outstretched arms of a tree reflection
I touched the back of a green garden spider
I touched the lack of trouble inside her

I've touched everything that I've ever come by
but I don't know why I touched the sky

once in a river I touched the nose of a trout
I touched fire in my yard, and then it went out
The ear of a clown I believed I could touch
but it turned into wax: that, I hated so much

I touched the tears of a child who started to cry
I touched a bee and he touched me, oh @%#$* my!
I touched the left side of a right-sided cow
I touched him again, but I'll never say how

I've touched everything from May to July
but I don't know why I touched the sky

the moral to this story is 'touch what you can'
become the biggest sense-of-touch fan
touch all the Reubens that are krauted on rye
touch all the bones and the wandering glass eye
touch all the big plants as well as bonsai 
then touch a sweet piece of boston cream pie

touch all you want and don't ever lie
But I'm warning you-- do not touch the sky!

for if you do, then you've done all you'll do
to the rest of your dreams you'll bid sad adieu 
there's just nothing left so don't even try
and that's why I'm sorry I touched the sky

I wish I knew why 

Venus

I saw Venus this morning
after the sun spectacularly arose
right through the living room window
in my wrinkled unflattering bed clothes

I looked past the prism that Josna gave us
past the bud elder bug camped on the sill
past the maple tree in the middle of losing its leaves
past the firs and oaks and pines lining the top of the hill

past the pink and gray clouds 
lit up by the rising sun
of all the bright objects in the night sky
there was left this morning just this one

it was strong and brilliant and bright
like a star at home on a pitch black night
but this was a lonely planet in the day!
I wanted coffee, but I couldn't look away

I watched it for awhile, thinking it would disappear
I knew it eventually would, but when?
the sun came up farther, the clouds turned normal
the sky grew very blue, and then...

It stayed! it didn't leave my sight
it dared me to look stronger
it looked me right in the eyes
and said I will feel my glory a little longer

How brave! How stubborn! How brazen!
to shine like it's dark as the day begins
I will not be outdone says the tiny light
refusing to put its night to an end

But the sun is jealous, yes he is
and does not permit such unsurrendering pride
as little planets trying to be bigger than they are.
And so, with a blast, the sun sent Venus to hide

You're still there, Venus, 141 million miles away
signaling to me; I know you are
and I'm going to wish on you!
I know you're a planet
but to me, this morning, you look just like a star

One

One

no ordinary 

One

no blocks against the sun anymore
no closing the door 
this time
I've finally found the

One

no ordinary 

One

my breathing has begun once again
who had the power to send
to me this special

One?

Across the water sails a ship for me
my time on solid ground is done
because I've found the

One

no ordinary 

One

and when I'm gone I'll run to His place
put my hands up to the face
of the most beautiful

One

no ordinary 

One

my beautiful

One

Earth

laurels rest
roses smell
Juniper binds

pizzas bubble
burgers broil
Reuben thrills

audis run
silverados stand
Winnebago rolls

worries steam
struggles untangle
Pleasure delivers

compassions build
loves release
Hope redeems

materials go
seasons pass
God remains

Grateful

down the hall
in stocking feet
out the door
and up the street

to the store
down the aisle
searching for
my lost smile

top row (please!)
left and right
middle row (I'll give anything!)
nothing in sight

bottom row (come on!)
right and left
empty boxes (gasp!)
signs of theft

to the counter
where's the clerk?
he's outside smoking
the lucky jerk

for he can breathe
and I cannot
so for this reason
I am distraught

but he's not here
to tell me where
to find the pills
to give me air

my chest erupts
my muscles seize
I dooley rambo
I cherry sneeze

I'll just sit down
and stay awhile
in this here skinny
medicine aisle

If you see the jerk
who's breathing fire
tell him please
my feeling's dire

ah! here he comes!
oh woe the fuss
he points me to
Alka-Seltzer Cold Plus

I wander home
hugging tight
my one desire
my one delight

this is where
I find my smile
thanks to the jerk
in the drugstore aisle

Walter, Trancharian lord

Walter stepped heel to toe, heel to toe, heel to toe. There was a rock in his shoe. He kicked a can, hopped over a fence, and landed in a pile of trash. Walter stared, as was his wont, for about 30 seconds at his foot underneath a rotting cantaloupe. Then he stared for 30 seconds at the sky, saw a curious flash, then turned his gaze toward a thunderous, huge vehicle coming down the street at an alarming rate of speed for such a size, multitudinous cans and shovels and rakes hanging from its sides. 

The truck was splendent in its design: beneath the clanging garbage accoutrements was silver and blue metal. It looked painted but then again it didn't; it looked rather organic. It was loud; the exhaust pipes blew shimmering heat into the morning air and the tress slightly above the roof. There was an hydraulic lift with two arms sticking forward out each side of the cab. It was a garbage truck. It roared toward Walter like it would run him over but the driver peered out the windscreen and smiled with a surprised look on his face as he slowed surprisingly quickly to a stop, the engine sounding like it was an unwinding turbine. 

The driver jumped out and landed two-footed in the street next to his truck. His garb was an impressive uniform: black knee boots with buckles, no laces. Blue-silver pants tucked in the boots with ringlets of silver cord down the outside seam and a large machete stuck there. He was not a man of perfect physical fitness-- there was a bit of a belly above his four-inch wide aluminum-looking belt. His shirt was as shiny as stainless steel but appeared as supple as cotton. He wore dark glasses that showed nothing of his eyes. His hair was tousled brown. 

He smiled and called out toward Walter: "Ho, Trancharian! What fortune I find you here, at last, returning to your ship. The stoic lord has appeared!"

Walter looked down and realized he was in standing a dumpster. He stared at his feet, not because he was processing the scene slowly, but because he was fascinated that he ended up here and couldn't remember how. And what was this, this...garbage man saying? Trancharian? Returning to my ship? Is there someone else here? Walter glanced side to side, then back at the garbage man.

"Come sit with me on my rear declination. We'll share some warm earthly beverage. There you are." Walter sat next to him on the bumper. "I know why you do not speak," the garbage man continued. "The female of your species on Tranchar are voluminous, in spirit, size, and speech. The males are like earth's black widow spiders-- they are timid and eaten after mating. But you have come here following one of your females. Very bold. It will be hard to find her: there are many like her here. My suggestion: try the fourth planet in this system-- it has life forms more suited to your desires. Ha ha!"

Walter raised his eyebrows. "Ah, I see you are interested!" said the garbage man. "Let me empty your ship of the human detritus and you can be on your way. Nasty humans, always fouling beautiful work. I use my ship in disguise to perform this task because such befoulment disgusts me. Once I have fixed the hypermatter induction port on my ship, I shall also be on my way. Perhaps we shall meet on the fourth planet!" The garbage man returned to his cab and emptied the dumpster.

"Thusly, Trancharian, your ship is ready! You are free to board!" Walter climbed back into the dumpster.

"May the stars guide your way!" the garbage man yelled. The garbage truck roared into reverse, turned, and glided down the street. 

Walter, Trancharian lord, closed the lid of the dumpster, lay down, fell asleep, and dreamed of space. 

Pulchritudinous, But I Digress

My baby she is beautiful, she is so pleasing to me
she is gorgeous all the time,  and I say that reasonably
My honey she is dazzling,
 she is easy on the eye
she's ravishing and fair,
she's graceful, that's no lie

Wait, you say, what's that? You said easy on the EYE
not eyes, which is plural. Are you a one eyed guy?
well yes it's true,
 for years now
I have only had the one
artistically x-ed out, like a mark on a hot cross bun

I don't know why you're surprised; it's not extraordinaire
My first name it is Tim and there's only one i there!
As a matter of fact
 you will never see
two i's  next to each other
even when it's a long sound like 'sign' or 'sing' or 'broither'

Oh no, I am mistaken! 'sing' is not an i sound
it sounds like 'ee' and there's no rule in our language that I found
that says an i
 has to sound like i:
oy, English sure is pliant
did you know that in the word 'broither' the i happens to be silent?

i doesn't have to sound like i, but I should sound like me
or am I now confused between alphabet and uniquity?
that word means uniqueness,
 by the way,
as I so easily discovered
looking at an online urban dictionary as my clicking right hand hovered

man made the words, however it seems words don't make the man
but this man only has one eye, so crooked do I stand
and all that I
 happen to see
only has one fine dimension
so when I speak of my girl's beauty, you may feel apprehension

I assure you, though, my wife is po-so-lu-te-ly bewitching
and when she deigns to look my way I feel my eye a' twitching
I notice you
 looked at her, too--
do you think she saw us?
She's pulchritudinous no doubt; thanks to my thesaurus

Late Last Night

late last night not long after my covers were destroyed
I had myself a dream in which I found myself employed
as a Ford Ranchero; rightly, I was mucho overjoyed
and I took a trip out west

driving down the country road the flames were in my eyes
I'm sure I saw a vulture starin' down from smokey skies
he said he wasn't hungry but I know he alway lies
looking for a tasty test

I shooed him away and then I drove out to the ocean
where a whale the size of Haystack Rock asked me for some lotion
he said he skin was sensitive unless he stayed in motion
so he could never rest

I left him a blubberin' whilst I headed for the hills
this side of Mississippi you know there are no bigger thrills
because in Mississippi hills are just the size of pills
even when they're at their best

rolling 'round and 'round in bed I sweatily awoke
my wife she had her finger poised to give my side a poke
she said she heard some name that in my sleep I may have spoke
and so I readily confessed

'I was a car, I saw some flames, a vulture tried to eat me
A dry-skinned whale down at the beach used car oil to complete me
an offended pill the size of Biloxi wanted to defeat me
no wonder the bed is messed!'

I wiped my brow, kissed her chin, and said to her discreetly
'my dream and nighttime voices do not always come out neatly'
we fell asleep, ah dreamless, in each other's arms so sweetly
now aren't you impressed?

Ode to a Girl

Laugh
Photograph
On my behalf?
Can I have your autograph?

Sing
Anything
Hands like wings
Now you're going to sit and swing

Dance
Stretchy pants
Happy glance
One more time for us, perchance?

Read
Giggles freed
A lasting need
It's never too soon to plant a seed

Girl
Hair aswirl
Legs atwirl
Around my heart her fingers curl

My Travelin' Baby Blues

Well I got a girl and my baby Siri is her name
Yeah I finally got a girl and my baby Siri is her name
If I don't know something about the world
You know my baby Siri is the one to blame

I left my home in Oregon headin' for the San Francisco Bay
Yes, I said goodbye to Oregon headed for the San Francisco Bay
my family was waiting for me
but I got lost along the way

I asked my Siri baby, why she steered me wrong
Well I asked my baby Siri, oh Lord why, why, why did you steer me wrong?
she said she did it to save me
15 minutes-- but Lord I was lost for oh so long

For two days I wandered around the busy Sacramento hills
Yeah two lonely days I was lost and wandered in those twisty Sacramento hills
couldn't find a Starbucks or Seven-Eleven
or my my phone charger; had to take my anti-anxiety pills

oh Siri you mistreat me, you're a phone-noise, unnerving, aggravating lady
oh Siri you mistreat me, you're a stone-voiced, unswerving, recalculating lady
I had to stop at a gas station
and ask a human, who told me, 'go west, young handsome man, on Interstate 80'

Now I don't really believe that there is someone inside my phone
No, no, I don't believe it-- I'm sayin' there's no one inside my phone
but when I ain't got nobody to talk to
you know I just can't leave her alone

Siri baby...

Twinkle

There was a little star
reflected, it seems, on the roof
of my car
but when I looked to find it 
in the sky
there were clouds

there was a beautiful tree
a picture, I guess, in a book
about the sea
but when I went to find it 
on the coast
a clearcut was there

there was a storm of snow
inside, I think, a little
glass window
but outside it was summer 
in the wind
and flowers were there

Twinkle. twinkle, little star
How I wonder where you are
in the sky or on my car
in a book or on the beach
on the ground or in a jar

reality's really not that far away

Cooktop Joe

Cooktop Joe
what a guy
I think I know but don't know why
Cooktop Joe can make a pie

See him work
see him fly
those around him, it's no lie,
love to see him deep fat fry

"fry, man, fry"
the children say
he gives them free fries everyday
because he's scared they'll go away

Cooktop Joe
sautes a lot
he puts those mushrooms in his pot
and waits until they get so hot

and then he adds
a little batter
to make the 'shrooms a little fatter
you disagree? What's s'matter?

Cooktop Joe 
has a recipe
a tablespoon of oil, of butter, three!
a little cream for felicity

all in all
it takes its toll
that deep-fried butter-mushroom roll
drowned in cream sauce in your bowl

heavy eyes
and reverie
who could make this devilry
taste like something heavenly?

Cooktop Joe
cooks a lot
and on my shirt there is a spot
to remind me, lest I forgot

Is he the best?
It's food for thought
his talents are a melting pot
I'm here for seconds; hey, why not?

The Dang

Dang, that's a lot of onions!
That's a dang lot of onions!
That's a lot of dang onions!
That's a lot of onions, dang it!

Onion trucks I view indifferently
but dang onions matter, indubitably
the dang may dangle, infinitely
and it costs nothing! Language is free!

I like to move the dang around
I like to see the dang abound
I like the simple ding-dang sound
of the ding-dang-dong that I have found

So do me a favor and write dang down
tear up the paper and spread it 'round town
let dang become your greatest renown 
and you will wear the ding-dang crown!

Later Dude

He said, "I'll see you later, ok?"

Then I thought of what could happen before I see him again? I could...

win the lottery
bake a cake
break my leg
die in a car wreck
make another friend
eat oysters
beat someone at ping-pong
write a story
call my mom
get mad
get even
forgive someone
forgive myself
make a list
lose a list
go surfing
wash my peanut shell collection
take a shower
get the gum off the bottom of my sock
look at the moon, the m-o-o-o-o-n
go for a long hike
sing loudly
sing softly
sing like a girl
play cards with my brother
play brother with my cards
google something
do something google-y
fry cook!

Then, after thinking all these things and looking at him with a thousand yard stare while he looked at me with his eyebrows raised waiting for my response I nodded and said, "Later, Dude."

I'm Alone All the Time

you’re sitting right next to me

you see my smile

you feel my arm

you probably smell me

you hear my breathing

hopefully you’re not tasting anything about me

but, unless there’s a sixth sense 

you have no idea what I’m thinking

I could be laughing inside

I could be crying inside

I could be mocking, sarcastic

loving, lusting, bored, depressed

anxious, distant, in France

naked, asleep, watching a movie

tasting sausages…

the list is endless

but if I keep my breathing even

my face expressionless or at least unchanging

and my body is still, my eyes straight forward

then you would have no idea of me

unless I speak, but even then it’s nebulous

some people are masters at speaking what they’re not thinking

this is an inherent contradiction with humans

there is so much going on in each person’s head

and only a micro percentage is communicated outwardly

yes an expert could tell about how I sit

or how I respond and what direction my eyes go when I do

but experts can’t keep me from taking a gun into a crowded arena

stealing funds from my Little League

cheating on my spouse, lying to a friend

but we’re not experts

we’re just people trying to get along, get through, move forward